Thursday, August 20, 2009

Year 2, Week 1

I don't have much to post about the first week thus far, because the first week of school is ICM week (as I may have noted before), in which we have lectures that are very important to our careers as honest-to-god doctors (as opposed to studying drones, which seems to be our current job path), but require very little studying and outside work. Thus far this week, I have sat through lectures regarding patient notes and documentation, performing a knee and shoulder exam, and taking a history on a geriatric patient. I have gotten dressed up in my shiny white coat and brand new clothes (There may have been a shopping spree at the Limited involved. Oops.) and discussed a "patient's" substance abuse problems and come up with a differential diagnosis for a woman with "fainting spells." I got drenched this morning running in heels to get to the door after forgetting my umbrella.

But all of this pales in comparison to the fabulous experience of the video we were forced to endure in an effort to teach us the intricacies of the dreaded Male Genital and Rectal exam.

That's right, folks. We got to watch a video for almost 20 minutes describing in detail how to a) grope and b) insert our fingers into butts of men across America. The inherent embarrassing giggles and stunned faces were compounded by the fact that the professor giving the lecture was an incredibly old man who talked very slowly and left for lots of awkward silences. I tell you, it was scarring.

The worst part is I get the pleasure of actually practicing this fabulous experience on a real live person (who has volunteered his time to the tune of several hundreds of dollars) coming up in a few weeks. The excitement is palpable. Really.

1 comment:

Katya said...

Aren't you glad you are going into pediatrics!? Or do children have to have rectal exams too? I hope not.