Hope, and then some

First exams came and went and I did really well.  Continuing to study was almost painful at first but getting easier again as we continue in the swing of things, finding my rhythm.  Finally got to go play trivia again last night, which was a much needed release.  Something about my goofy guys just relaxes me...  I find it odd and even a bit surprising that one of D's best friends (best man at our wedding, no less) has slowly but surely become one of mine.  I say odd because we're definitely not your typical "best friends"...I mean, we don't call each other a lot or talk about much on our own, but we do hang out sometimes when he comes to stay at our house and we wait for Daniel to get off work, and he can always make me laugh.  I hope every day that he finds a great girl and we can all laugh together, because laughter is something we could just all use more of.  

The past couple of weeks (maybe three, even...) have been a complete roller coaster on the personal level.  School has been, well, school, and everything's fine there, but there have just been a lot of personal issues for D and me.  Some of them very long-standing, others new, but it's been very emotional.  I think, now, that we've finally gotten to a point of upswing.  We've made some deals and compromises that I hope we can keep, and I hope they can help him (and me) to climb out of the dark place we've found ourselves in lately.  Today, things went really well, no problems...and for maybe the first time I'm actually allowing myself to hope that we might yet work our way out of this.  He's started running again.  It was kind of a fluke...I read somewhere that lots of people who are in his situation (which I'm sorry, for anyone who might ever read this, but I'll not name here...) benefit a great deal from exercise, especially those who used to be big athletes like he was.  Last night at trivia, I asked one of his good friends who also used to run to make him do it again.  And right now, they're off at the park.  I'm hoping it will help ground him, give him a bigger friend base to lean on, and work off some of the energy he can build up sometimes.  Meanwhile, it gives me time to reflect and study and mow the lawn.  It's one day at a time....but hope is like air around here right now.